A trip to Mars

When women were women and porn was porn

2009-11-02T04:21:00.000-08:00

The day before yesterday i discovered a german artbook with a collection of post WWII erotica, when women looked so much more like me, soft, curvy and well, not starved.
somehow, they were much more appealing than the fashionable current look of large-breasted, bleached and small hipped dolls.

think pin-ups.

no need to show you modern-day erotca, si?

A guide for the inexperienced booker or the booker's guide to the galaxy : PART 2

2009-10-27T07:23:00.000-07:00

during our last tour i had a few new ideas to mention, some are very basic really, but i thought they're still important enough to point out -

no detail is too small to mention - ask whether they'll feed or lodge you.

send them your technical requirements - otherwise you'll find out the venues is missing mics or even a sound system - yes, even a PA and speakers!

try to make an easy course - make sure the distances are not too far, the roads in Poland for instance are very narrow and slow, you'll pass through villages and farms - and it'll take about 12 hours to finish a 700 kilometers long ride.
we had to learn the hard way - we were late twice, one of the gigs had been cancelled. they start early, at 20:30.
(you can use GooggleMaps in order to calculate the distances between cities), you can even check the prices for gas in different countries online.

oh yeah, of course! make sure you know when's your sound check!

ask for an emergency phone number of the gigs' promoter, just in case. you never know whether there's a tornado coming up or killer bees heading your way. or well, you know, you might just get lost on the way, it's a new town and a new language and all.

you should also check the local currency's value, just to make sure you know how much you're spending on a local sandwich... it might surprise you later, unless you learn in advance.

you'll need visas to enter certain countries - or at least a transit visa, to pass through. especially in Eastern-Europeans countries. ask your embassy or check it online.

a day without any gigs is only good if you're not worried about money,
otherwise it'll be extra expenses - car rental, sleeping places, etc...

always make extra cash by selling merch - cd's are absolutely necessary.

try to research about the local press, ask your promoter or the booker whether you can send anything to the local magazines/radio stations. yes, usually, it's not your job, but when you're completely on your own, it's just one of those things that you can take care of, not all places promote their own gigs.

hey, good luck!

Subcultures : The kids of the 80's or meet The Fringes

2009-09-03T02:14:00.000-07:00

We are a mix and match generation.

i think we can name the semi-invisible current subculture, the mega-subculture that no one's really aware of- "the fringes". it's raw at the ends, it twists many different styles from the 20th century, but not only, it goes further into the decades. it's an extension of punk and later indie and it's not quite either. i think the anti-folkers were part of it in the early 2000's, and now it's the likes of Patrick wolf and Mikachu and even Florence Welch and the new generation of folk musicians, such as Devendra Banhart. it's the result of the instant information, the accessibility of multiple kinds of information at the same time, the Internet, the recorded history - presented to us, kids of the 1980's, creating a nostalgia
towards times that we had never really lived through, though we know what they looked liked and we certainly know what they sounded like.

The Fringes have a certain "do it yourself" attitude towards art, but they're not afraid of the industry, especially when it adopts them the way they are, without interfering. i bet we'll see examples in literature and television as well, when it gets a bit more mainstream and loses it's charm. it feels apocalyptic, like a last revolution, but perhaps every revolution wants to be the last and becomes suicidal. it certainly has a more politically aware attitude - more queer friendly, more environmental... it's not necessarily Caucasian-dominated, the world's changing, people moving from one place to another, eventually we'll all be a blend of nationalities and origins. nothing will be exotic anymore, unless WE make it such.

the fringes resent the mainstream, television and most of the music on the radio. it thrives in large cities all over the world, but it's completely under the radar as a movement, an ideology. people fail to recognise the spirit, which unites all "hipsters"... - we give them a general name, while there's something more that makes them part of THIS time and not the 1980's or the 90's or any other decade.

A guide for the inexperienced booker or the booker's guide to the galaxy

2009-02-16T10:52:00.000-08:00

May you be a band member seeking gigs or an aspiring booker for others, erm, yeah.
you might find these tips useful:

* the best time to write to either venues or promoters is about three months in advance - it's not too early and not too late. that's what i found from my experience. but it differs from one promoter to another.

* don't send exaggerated superlatives or press quotations, write a short description yourself. make it simple and to the point, depending on whom you wish to impress that is.

* you can send a photo or a couple, just throw them into the package. it's pretty, it's colorful and it's not very hard.

* don't send mp3's directly, send links. a myspace address or a website will do.

* don't send demos by mail, that is actual cd's. you'll soon realize it's damn expensive and that nobody bothers to listen to them these days, clubs claim that a lot of people still send cd's by mail, i think it's a waste of time and money.

* always look for a similar band/band you like from the city where you wish to play.
they might have the right audience for you. ask to share the bill with them, later when they come to your town, you'll help THEM out.

* think of your target audience - is you music arty? try art spaces, galleries and so on. party music? talk to party collectives. queer? talk to a ladyfest.

* for places to stay you can either try couch surfing, or if you're left winged and socially/politically involved, you can always seek autonomous collectives, squats and so on. or in the worst case - there's always hostels or your cosy little van.
some places have a room for guest bands, they will tell you about it themselves.
clubs obviously don't. but they also usually pay more.

* most importantly - don't hesitate to ask for help! ask everyone you think might have more information than you do. yes, that means - other bands. most people will like to be able to assist.

for a list of booking collectives and venues in Europe ask me via e-mail:
marycheeses at gmail dot com

Women are from Venus... and they're hungry for revenge

2009-01-22T06:58:00.000-08:00

According to "Queen of Outer Space" (1958), women are desperate, uptight mean bitches... and of course, all they need is a dick.

Memorable quote:
"men did this to me! men and their wars!!!"

Valuable lesson:
Ugly women (with disfigured faces) will never be loved.

watch it here.

Weirdos & trends: novelty acts, outsider artists and popular culture.

2009-01-10T11:20:00.000-08:00

There is a fine line between complete obscurity and popular culture.

A "novelty" they call it.
it could be a funny gag or a new take on mundane matters that arrives at the right split of a second and drives millions mad (for another second or so).

As in the fine example of Tiny Tim who seemed always very much aware of his double standard position - he had always known the crowd never took him seriously. it's in his body language.
as a musician he was never the mainstream's cup of tea, they found him so ridiculous it was funny. funny is good. Americans love funny.

The lovely Klaus Nomi and Lene Lovich.
what happened in the 80's stays in the 80's (or the late 1970's).
The 1980's are known for their extravagant neon bright fashion, shoulder pads and for quite some vocalists with impossible hairdos, amongst other things that couldn't possibly be tolerated in the following couple of decades.

or this wonderful recording from 1901 by Dan W. Quinn - "I want to go to Morrow", which is based on a simple word play, you can either admire it for it's simplicity or find dull with such little effort.

or the whole Screamin' Jay Hawkins' voodoo thing. the costumes, the little friend on a stick, absolutely everything.

or the 90's hit "I'm too sexy", which is quite funny if you ignore the trashy pop that was forced onto it in the cheesy video.

or the more recent example of Electric 6 with "Danger! high voltage!" and "Gay bar" (the only songs that became smash hits of the band's entire catalogue).

Liam Lynch's "United states of whatever". or perhaps better yet - this one:

or funny guys like Jon Lajoie and one of his many masterpieces, "Show me your genitals":

or the Harry Merry phenomenon:

Outsider artists like Wesley Willis, even the Legendary Stardust Cowboy. or Avant-garde troubadours like Scott Walker live according to their own rhythm, and aren't bothered with a certain zeitgeist - they seem to be untouched by the time, able to base their entire careers upon a single schtick and it'll be so illusive or so ridiculous you'll end up wondering whether you can see what someone with a fine taste says there is. sometimes you'll find yourself both admiring it and feeling somewhat repulsed at the same time, knowing there's something not quite right about it.
The main difference between an "outsider artist" and just a very kooky showman is in the use of the medium - the first's usually limited (or on the contrary) by his technique or mental perception and the other -well, is just putting on an act, an exaggerated, extravagant, over-the-top show.

other really good novelty tracks you should listen to:

No bra - "Munchausen"
Bob McFadden - "The mummy"
George M. Cohan - "Life's A Funny Proposition After All"
Ada Jones And Billy Murray With The American Quartet - "Come Josephine In My Flying Machine"
Bob Peck - "Sweet sixteen".

A treasure

2008-11-29T05:34:00.000-08:00

Today I found a box underneath my coal oven, it was almost hidden away, casually laying there, waiting to be spotted and taken out for examination.

when I opened the box I found dozens of tapes with various mixes and albums. some date back to 1998, maybe even earlier.

The only unintentional gift I found before of the previous inhibitor of my room was a Rolling Stones cassette in the purple stereo on the shelf. but this? this is astonishing!

She must have left in a hurry, leaving all that behind, never claiming it back.
All that history, her personal history!

I read the labels on the tapes, only a few were familiar, Tori Amos' "Little Earthquakes", Tom Waits' "Blue valentines" and "Mule variations" (the only indication of the last years in the entire collection).
she had lots of random Jazz and Punk compilations, some Hip Hop and Electronics, European 80's pop music and a very random David Bowie compilation.

"If they mated" galore : the unplugged series

2008-11-19T10:10:00.000-08:00

and just like that the quality of the writing goes to hell.
so be it. it was a hell lotta fun making them up!

(Gaby S. Moses and I discussed them together, thanks mate).

Bad taste masses

2008-11-08T18:10:00.000-08:00

this is what i consider to be sincere. it speaks somehow very clearly in all of its theatrical, melodramatic expression. but i believe it, I really do.

and I absolutely do not understand who allows this to happen.
popular television or culture or socio-anthropological phenomenas cause the common man to somehow accept or believe in the fake, the empty and absolutely tasteless imitation of a once existing emotion that is now long gone. I am afraid they're no longer able to tell the difference.
I wonder if they ever did.

Song for a future generation.

2008-11-08T17:38:00.000-08:00

a part from The Strokes' - "The other side":

"I hate them all, I hate them all
I hate myself
For hating them
so I'll drink some more
I'll love them all
I'll drink even more
I'll hate them even more than I did before"

A friend of mine mentioned today this piece, which he considers to be great song writing, with top-notch lyrics, which he feels are superior to his.
it got me thinking.

The Strokes have "classic" written all over them.
in twenty years these songs will be for someone who was born yesterday what Iggy Pop is for me.
something from another dimension, untouchable, frozen in time, an eternal mystery.
how ridiculous this all is, generated by hype and wide, blank expressions. oouh!

How come the future sounds so much like the past?

2008-10-19T03:58:00.000-07:00

In Kill you idols one of the no wave idols' complaints was the influence of the past on the present generation of bands.
but it isn't necessarily bad.

The kids of today are exposed to so much more than in the past.
they can listen to records that are out of print, they can watch virtually non existing videos on YouTube. it is a never ending world of possibilities, of course, if you know how to pick them, but for that obviously you need to have good taste and it is no mystery that the masses never did.

industry VS. art

Well, they were right about the distressing longing of the present generation to "do or die" - become the band of the moment, earn a lot of money and well, that's it. there is no intention to make anything more valuable, no pretension to make art, God forbid to express themselves somehow differently! nope, they only reflect the zeitgeist, as it is portrayed in the fashionable magazines.
And just like the "current fashion" on most street fashion blogs, the pictures only promote last season's trends, the assembly line is always one step behind.
our assembly line is called the NME.

A strange coincidence? The similarity between a Rolling Stones song and another by Roger Whittaker. good God!

2008-10-08T04:09:00.000-07:00

yep. another case of plagiarism. a funny one.

it's (Goodbye) Indian lady and (Goodbye) Ruby Tuesday.

goodness! even the "goodbye" is there!

(and it's the German version! which adds up to the bad after taste, as the chorus is still sung in English)

I'm horrified.

"Ruby Tuesday" came out as early as 1967.
"Indian lady" waited another 4 years.

i rest my case.

Oh no! it's the Gary Numan syndrom!

2008-10-07T13:28:00.000-07:00

The distorted synthesizers slowly emerge as shinny black guitars,
and ties turn black vinyl. mid life crisis? oh, it doesn't matter why,
here are the facts.

->

->

others?
new-wavers-turned-metal-dummies?
can you spot them?

The surfing Nintendo

2008-10-06T01:52:00.000-07:00

I like unexpected blends of subcultures that would seem meaningless to an outsider, but it would mean the world to the weirdo that lives upon that stuff (yeepie!)

You know the Psychobilly kids, they have lots of retro tattoos, wear leather jackets and put Grease in their savage Pompadours or their notorious Beehives.

it's a tradition and you don't mess with tradition.
unless you're a real rebel and you don't follow archaic rules.

like Johnny, Jive Johnny.
who kills folks on the street and puts them in his refrigerator.
or that's what Jemek Jemowit told me, since most of the song is in German.

it's a fascinating mash of 80's hardcore electronic sounds. a quick reminder of all the Super Marios and Sonic the Hedgehogs of my and my friend's childhood. the same sounds that the Nu-rave kids like to abuse on MTV.

Alan Vega should be proud, his legacy lives on and morphs into something even stranger as it goes. that bloody monster never sleeps.

take a look at Charlie Megira's video as well, 1950's beach party in Jaffa, an Israeli underground myth.
"Rock'N'Roll in Hebrew is just Dynamite" goes the chorus. here's another tradition blown up to pieces.

21st century myths: MySpace as an enormous showroom.

2008-07-18T11:33:00.000-07:00

MySpace is the notorious, most popular social network on earth.
dead folks, as well as alive folks, vegetables and pets exhibit their lives
on web pages at MySpace.com.

some have created a wonderful pastime, instead of sending your virtual
friends spam or cheesy wishes, some hundreds of them spend hours sending
vintage photographs, paintings and other goods, creating a never ending chain
of artwork, a virtual gallery, free and accessible for all.

some popular profiles of artists and art lovers may be found here:

http://www.myspace.com/terrysi
http://www.myspace.com/marinaib
http://www.myspace.com/lviia
http://www.myspace.com/laviniascreams
http://www.myspace.com/dressedundressed

2008-04-06T08:05:00.000-07:00

In Israel we did not have to fight for each show.
People, no more than a few dozens, but still, an audience,
would show up every time. they were attraction-hunters,
they were looking for something to do on a Friday night,
and they found it.

In Berlin, as in other big cities I suppose, people do not need
to be fed manually by your graciousness, oh no.
They have so much to pick from! hundreds of simultaneous
events, every night, every day, 365 days a year.

Hence, not only you have to make music, of extremely high quality,
you must also wrap it up in a unique appearance, you must have a
"show": weird instruments will do, a multimedia performance, even
a ridiculous gimmick of sorts. The music itself just won't seem to do
these days.
They will not pay attention, overwhelmed by all the noise made by
other people, so much noise, it is impossible to focus any longer on
just one thing, they keep on searching for something else while you
are standing on a stage, like so many others, not worth of their
attention. you can be as alone on a stage as you are in your bedroom.

Mighty Sphincter - Helter Skelter (cover)

The.human.harp

2008-03-31T10:31:00.000-07:00

The "Mouth harp", the "Jaw Harp" or even the "Jew harp" is considered very chic for some reason, very risky, that is, experimental musicians seem to dig it a lot.

Here are a few examples, I personally think that it could be used in more varied ways, after all, its metalic-springy tone is fairly recognizable and
couldn't possibly be mistaken for any other instrument.

Meredith Monk - "Jew's harp"
Old Time Relijun - "Khomuz"
Buffy Sainte-Marie - "Cripple Creek"

New bands that I'm really excited about: #1: Late of The Pier

2008-03-21T03:29:00.000-07:00

These guys come from England, the NME liked them enough
but didn't wave them like another trophy act, one of those that
really make you sick like a random one-nighter... but then, who knows,
it might still happen, I hold every label responsible for over-the-top-
promotion.
anyway, back on topic, Late of The Pier have a certain Nu-Raveness
to them, very up to date fashion-wise, but their songwriting is much
Superior to say, the Klaxons', the Pioneers of the genre, that are in
my opinion, mere flash and glitter and a a hell of a great wardrobe.

So they took Gary Numan-ish synths and mixed them with 80's Atari
video games, poured some old fashioned Garage, and it's absolutely
delicious.

Here's a quick taste of their Demo, which was distributed free of charge
through MySpace:

(a great introduction to the demo compilation):
Late of The Pier - A thousand years ago

Late of The Pier - Space and the woods

Late of The Pier - Dose A

Late of The Pier - Random firl

oh, there's more, here's their video to
"Bathroom Gurgle":

Dear Berliners,

2008-03-17T09:55:00.000-07:00

If you live in the Berlin area and love Nico (may she rest in peace) you are welcome to join the picnic in her memory,
here you may find details.

if you don't, you can still listen to her version of Bowie's "Heroes".

Nico - Heroes.

Le Marquis

2008-03-16T04:30:00.000-07:00

Do you recon Donatien Alphonse Francios de Sade had any clue of his future legacy and historic significance?

Or could've predicted the inspiration of his tales of love and lust,
corruption and virtue on the centuries to come? as they live on in the modern era. side by side with marriage, elevators and aeroplanes?

Not all songs about violence celebrate it, some tell us about weakend characters in desperate search of a way out.
but here are a few tales of dominant-submissive, violent,
yet admirably passionate relationships, also, rather astonishing
songs.

Franz Ferdinand - Darts of Pleasure

The Velvet Underground - Venus in Furs (Outtake)

Antony and The Johnsons - Fistful of love (feat. Lou Reed)